My Quirky Boy
Sep. 21st, 2004 11:48 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
lalicopaSmack me, someone. Please.
I succumbed to all the fucking peer pressure and took Laszlo to a "separation class" today at a place called Totnastics. I figured since it wasn't Gymboree (which he despises) and since his lil friend Ethan was in the class, that maybe he'd be ok.
Of course, Ethan was late, so I had to drop my kid off in a strange place with a bunch of strange people. Ok, i didn't HAVE to, but I chose to. I didn't tell anyone that I was taking him, because I didn't want to hear afterward the plethora of inquiries about "how it went" - especially if it was treacherous. I didn't even tell Robert until he got home from work.
The teacher was this sort of arrogant girl, probably early 20's, and she had an assistant - some guy named Zach, about the same age. I asked what I should do. When I called earlier to see about this free trial class, the girl told me that all the kids scream, that they expect it the first few classes, blah blah blah. Guess what. Only 1 kid screamed. Guess which kid it was. BINGO.
Zach took Laszlo on as his own lil project for the class. I was pleased with how he handled him. He had Laszlo in his lap and he kept trying to engage him. Every time Laszlo called for me, I stuck my head up and waved, said it was ok. I was in another room, but there was an open huge window between them so you could see the kids and vice versa. I didn't have a chance to tell them anything about my kid. So they had no clue. And they had about 8 other kids to deal with. None of whom were screaming, did I mention that?
Zach carried Laszlo around and showed him things in the gym. He kept trying to put Laszlo down, but he'd have no part of it. This is what he does with me too. I guess the good news is that he automatically knew that Zach was a safe person or something, because he was attaching himself to him right away. He doesn't do that with most people.
The class is supposed to be 50 minutes long. Laszlo was brought back out to me about 25 minutes into the class. He did ok really for the first 20, I was impressed. He was sort of looking around and almost on the verge of playing. Then all the kids went into this huge inflated thing that they jump around in and he lost it. The girl teacher told Zach to "bring him back to his mother" because he had to help with the other kids and Laszlo wasn't budging. Understandable.
I waited there until the class ended, feeling really bad about my son. Scratch that. Feeling really bad about myself. I hate having to answer to people about *why* he's not in school yet (yes, I KNOW he's only 2 1/2, but here it's like insane to people not to have your kid in school at this age.) I hate people suggesting to me that I'm doing some sort of harm by keeping him home and not forcing him to go to school. I take him to the park, he socializes...but this is where I hear it most. And I don't want to isolate myself or him from activities because I'm sick of assholes saying stupid shit about my kid who most of them don't even know.
Yeah, the stereotypes about Long Island are true. I'm here to let y'all know that.
I called my old shrink and Laszlo's pediatrician (the one I have the crush on) and left messages. I spoke to the pediatrician a few hours ago and he eased my mind, as he always does (thus the crush). He said this is just who Laszlo is. That I shouldn't rush him, that he's clearly not ready for school, but that it's a good idea to take him back to this class to "desensitize" him a bit - which I think is a good idea I guess. It does bother me that he's not social, but everyone has their "thing" and this is just his. I know he'll go to school when he has to and that he'll be fine. I guess I'm just feeling a bit like a square peg and it's getting to me like I never thought it would.
Hopefully he won't bug out as hard next week, or at least maybe one of the other lil kids will be kind enough to bug out with him. I'm also going to request from my friend to get Ethan there on TIME, so Laszlo can go into the class with someone he knows.
I think mostly this is something I hate in myself that I see in my child, no matter how much I tried to avoid it. I'm an extremely social and friendly person, but I hate crowds, concerts, loud restaurants, etc. I feel panicky and want out of my own skin. I hate that he got that from me. I feel I've failed him somehow.
Ok, going to go back and ljcut this if I can remember how, guess this entry got pretty long. Shit, can't I EVER get to sleep before midnight??
Fuck.
I succumbed to all the fucking peer pressure and took Laszlo to a "separation class" today at a place called Totnastics. I figured since it wasn't Gymboree (which he despises) and since his lil friend Ethan was in the class, that maybe he'd be ok.
Of course, Ethan was late, so I had to drop my kid off in a strange place with a bunch of strange people. Ok, i didn't HAVE to, but I chose to. I didn't tell anyone that I was taking him, because I didn't want to hear afterward the plethora of inquiries about "how it went" - especially if it was treacherous. I didn't even tell Robert until he got home from work.
The teacher was this sort of arrogant girl, probably early 20's, and she had an assistant - some guy named Zach, about the same age. I asked what I should do. When I called earlier to see about this free trial class, the girl told me that all the kids scream, that they expect it the first few classes, blah blah blah. Guess what. Only 1 kid screamed. Guess which kid it was. BINGO.
Zach took Laszlo on as his own lil project for the class. I was pleased with how he handled him. He had Laszlo in his lap and he kept trying to engage him. Every time Laszlo called for me, I stuck my head up and waved, said it was ok. I was in another room, but there was an open huge window between them so you could see the kids and vice versa. I didn't have a chance to tell them anything about my kid. So they had no clue. And they had about 8 other kids to deal with. None of whom were screaming, did I mention that?
Zach carried Laszlo around and showed him things in the gym. He kept trying to put Laszlo down, but he'd have no part of it. This is what he does with me too. I guess the good news is that he automatically knew that Zach was a safe person or something, because he was attaching himself to him right away. He doesn't do that with most people.
The class is supposed to be 50 minutes long. Laszlo was brought back out to me about 25 minutes into the class. He did ok really for the first 20, I was impressed. He was sort of looking around and almost on the verge of playing. Then all the kids went into this huge inflated thing that they jump around in and he lost it. The girl teacher told Zach to "bring him back to his mother" because he had to help with the other kids and Laszlo wasn't budging. Understandable.
I waited there until the class ended, feeling really bad about my son. Scratch that. Feeling really bad about myself. I hate having to answer to people about *why* he's not in school yet (yes, I KNOW he's only 2 1/2, but here it's like insane to people not to have your kid in school at this age.) I hate people suggesting to me that I'm doing some sort of harm by keeping him home and not forcing him to go to school. I take him to the park, he socializes...but this is where I hear it most. And I don't want to isolate myself or him from activities because I'm sick of assholes saying stupid shit about my kid who most of them don't even know.
Yeah, the stereotypes about Long Island are true. I'm here to let y'all know that.
I called my old shrink and Laszlo's pediatrician (the one I have the crush on) and left messages. I spoke to the pediatrician a few hours ago and he eased my mind, as he always does (thus the crush). He said this is just who Laszlo is. That I shouldn't rush him, that he's clearly not ready for school, but that it's a good idea to take him back to this class to "desensitize" him a bit - which I think is a good idea I guess. It does bother me that he's not social, but everyone has their "thing" and this is just his. I know he'll go to school when he has to and that he'll be fine. I guess I'm just feeling a bit like a square peg and it's getting to me like I never thought it would.
Hopefully he won't bug out as hard next week, or at least maybe one of the other lil kids will be kind enough to bug out with him. I'm also going to request from my friend to get Ethan there on TIME, so Laszlo can go into the class with someone he knows.
I think mostly this is something I hate in myself that I see in my child, no matter how much I tried to avoid it. I'm an extremely social and friendly person, but I hate crowds, concerts, loud restaurants, etc. I feel panicky and want out of my own skin. I hate that he got that from me. I feel I've failed him somehow.
Ok, going to go back and ljcut this if I can remember how, guess this entry got pretty long. Shit, can't I EVER get to sleep before midnight??
Fuck.
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no subject
Date: 2004-09-22 01:02 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-09-22 10:42 am (UTC)damn, I could have written that myself... have you ever thought about going on anti-anxiety meds (like Paxil?) - they don't do anything for me (I'm bipolar) but I know a lot of people say it really helps. I really hope Annabel doesn't inherit my brain issues too... but I've already noticed that she's a little timid in public and takes awhile to warm up to any new environment I bring her into. I really try to get out of the house and socialize with other moms/babies too... but it's just so hard on ME that I can only do it once a week max!
I think the class with Laszlo is a good idea, maybe next time he'll be able to handle it for 30 minutes? Does Zach work there on a regular basis? Maybe schedule your next class for when he's working since Laszlo has already made a positive attachment with him?
(and thanks for adding me!)