Three...that's the magic number

This time was much easier, I knew what I was doing. The pants alone last night took me a bit over an hour, and they have a few mistakes. These took me an hour from start to hitting "post" right now...including the shirt and everything.

Hopefully I'll come up with some sort of system, but we'll see! I'm so happy.

I've always wanted to make ruffle-bottom pants. Basically, all I ever sew is a straight line. I tried using patterns a few years back and got scared of them, so they've been packed away for years now.

Last night I was browsing on etsy and I found a super cute pattern for toddler ruffle pants. This evening I decided to sit down and give it a shot. It took me about an hour (it would probably take the seamstresses out there a whole ten minutes) but they came out so cute and they actually fit Ella! I used red sushi fabric, mostly because I have a ton of it. I see some pants-making in my very near future. They're just too damn adorable to not make a million pairs of.

I know this doesn't seem like much to those of you who sew, but for me it's a very big deal because I'm trying to grow my business again and adding a whole new *thing* to my stock is so very exciting for me...especially since I always fear the things I've never done creatively.

I pretty much stopped doing my Cute Threads business when I had Ella. I still made the odd thing here or there, but my rack was sparse and I was telling people I'd start again one day, but not sure when.

A few months ago, several of my friends convinced me to start again.

My friend Lori got me to do two local shows (one at a fundraiser for a co-op nursery school and one at a local synagogue for members), neither of which were very successful. At the first fundraiser, there were about ten vendors, and they placed me two tables away from the other tie dye kids' clothing table. And her stuff was really trendy, so she made $750 (I heard her checking out with the organizer) and I made $150. My stuff is WAY nicer, totally unique, but people don't want unique. They want what they see in stores and what they see all over the place.

The second fundraiser was better, even though I made less money. It wasn't because people were buying trendy stuff, it was because nobody was really buying and there was a shitty turnout...

Tonight I did my first house party. I was hesitant, but agreed because Lori arranged it and said the house was perfect, etc. Lori sells Melissa and Doug stuff discounted and she also sells jewelry that she makes AND picture frames. I thought it was going to be me and Lori. I walked in and there was a woman setting up layette stuff; onesies, blankets, hats, socks...really cute. But it was fucking kid clothes. I have newborn stuff. I don't understand why if there is any other vendor, my stuff doesn't sell. My prices are very reasonable, my stuff is awesome (not being biased, people always tell me how great it is) but it just doesn't sell.

I agreed to do one more fundraiser and I made the organizer guarantee me that there wouldn't be any other tie dye OR kid clothing vendors. She was happy to guarantee me and said she heard my stuff was great and she was glad I agreed to do it. She actually tried getting me last year, but she called the night we put Alabama to sleep and I couldn't focus. Anyway...

I came home with sixty bucks tonight, and that's from the hostess of the party tonight. I would have charged her less, but she booked the other woman, which totally pissed me off. That's all I sold. THE WHOLE TIME.

My website is horribly outdated, I need to photograph all the super cool things I've made recently and get that back up and running. At least I'll have someplace to display my stuff to people who are interested.

It took so much for me to start working again. I was fearful of the rejection I felt in the past. It took me a while to build up my business and it was doing great when I stopped.

It's not the economy, because people were buying tons of Lori's shit. And people bought from that other woman tonight too, albeit very few things.

I'm aggravated and insulted. I feel like a loser. I feel like maybe I'm delusional, but I know I'm not because people are seriously always saying how much they love my stuff and how they want to order stuff, blah blah blah.

On the way home just now I was thinking about throwing myself a house party, with all my friends and their friends. I know the turnout would be huge. I could get rid of my kids for the night or I could have them stay in the basement or upstairs for most of the time. I am really thinking about doing this...also this way if someone wants something that I don't have on the rack, I can show them the size in a blank or I can show them a fabric, etc. in the basement. I just think maybe that would get my confidence back up and put things back the way they were. But if I did all that and still didn't sell anything, I think I'd just fucking totally give up.

Oh, the first fundraiser I did, the one with the other tie dye table? The girls who own that business approached me to do their dyeing for them! They wanted peace symbols and guitars and stars, because they outsource all their dyeing (which is fucking ugly) and they were totally impressed with my mad dye skillz.

So WTF????

I wanted to come home and talk to Robert about it, for him to tell me how beautiful my stuff is (because that's one thing he actually does), but for the first time EVER, I got home early AND everyone is sound asleep. I'm in shock. I never got home this early from a home party and the kids have never all been sleeping.

And I've got a splitting headache.

And I ate like a total animal at the party, like two dozen pigs in blankets, half a pound of cheese and four brownies.

And I only went to the gym once this week.

I totally hate myself right now.

Well, not an epic fail, but still.

I should really know better than to actually document my intentions of doing work. Because something *always* gets in the way.

Ella, my rambunctious little angel, naps for 2 1/2 to 3 hours every day. Every day.

Today? No. Nap. None. I put her to bed, but she was screaming. Non. Stop.

I think the teeth she's getting are hurting her. She's not unhappy. She just didn't want that nap.

It wasn't a total waste of motivation...I did get a few things dyed this morning and planned out some others. I'm trying out some new shapes and patterns and I cannot wait until tomorrow morning to wash them out and see if they came out recognizable or just as big messes of color.

I'm planning on getting back into sewing...I'm really only good at making straight lines. How vital is a serger? I want to be able to tailor existing clothing.

I'm very tempted to get one.

Mentally, that is...

My friend Sheryl was over the other day and she was looking through my stock. She chose a dress to bring to a birthday party she was attending for two little girls. The younger girl just turned two.

Sheryl gave her this dress. The little girl loved it so much she insisted on putting it on right away. I hear this a lot when kids receive my stuff as gifts. It's usually the dresses, but it happens with other stuff and even with boys.

And yet, I'm still not motivated to go back into business. I don't know what it's going to take. I don't know what my problem is. I have more than $500 worth of new stock, washed and ready to dye, and it's just sitting neatly in all the clear bins (yes, Katie) organized by size and season.



Sheryl said if this doesn't motivate me, she doesn't know what will.

I made Lily this dress last night in a rush for her "Three Jamboree" at school today:




...and a mom from Lily's class is having her fourth baby (a girl) any day and asked me to make these:

The package "is probably somewhere in the building," but they have no idea where. Apparently it was not definitely on the truck just because it was scanned on the truck, sometimes they don't physically have it there, they just PLAN on having it there, so it gets scanned. It's definitely NOT on the truck now though, that much they know.

And Dharma won't ship me out another one until the trace is finished on the shipped package, which takes 1-7 business days. So even if it's completely lost, I don't get another one for about a week.

I mean, I could have probably protested and insisted that they send me out another one ASAP on UPS' dime, but the Dharma woman was so nice and apologetic, and it wasn't their fault anyway, so I let it slide.

I'm still beyond aggravated though. I don't think I've ever been this motivated without supplies. It's like a test of my desire to get started again.

This is for my friend at the gym.


And this is for my friend's daughter, I think it's the most perfect heart I've ever dyed.

I had to dye something for a long outstanding order and I decided that it's pathetic that I haven't made anything for my own kids in ages. So...I checked out my 6-12 month stash and sewed up this cute lil outfit for Ella to wear to Gymboree tomorrow (lots of potential business).