Three...that's the magic number

A few weeks ago I heard Laszlo talking to Lily. She accidentally said, "Back when I was a little boy..." Laszlo said, "Lily, you used to be a little boy? What happened, you had gender assignment surgery?"

I jumped in. I asked what he was talking about. He said, "Mommy, you told me that people can change their gender by gender assignment surgery."

I had no recollection of that conversation, but I DO tell them stuff like that if the subject comes up. I told him it was gender REassignment surgery. But like, months ago. And he remembered it. The kid's brain is such a vault, and he uses everything appropriately, even if it's just been filed away for ages.

I went to Laszlo's "Writers' Celebration" in his class. One of the boys was having some difficulty reading and Laszlo said, "Frankie needs to practice his fluency." I almost choked on my corn muffin.

Ella will be three in a month. She is so gorgeous and funny that she takes my breath away. She is obsessed with Yo Gabba Gabba. She has the small figurines of the characters and she sits quietly for hours making them talk to each other and sing the songs from the show. She adds other toys to the mix. I have to videotape her because it's so precious and funny.

Robert bought her a Barbie doll the other day and she keeps calling it "Barley." So now I ask her to say the doll's name and she says, "Barley is a dinosaur, magic magic-ation."

She's also started calling me Momma instead of Mommy. All the kids did this for some reason and I just love it every time. The other two went back to Mommy after a while...I'm hoping Ella sticks with the Momma.

Lily is still all that's sweet and good in the world, but she has been feeling her oats a little and being a bit annoying. She's been deliberately irritating Laszlo and Ella and even me sometimes, just to get a reaction. I guess being good becomes boring after a while - not that I'd know. ;-)

This morning Laszlo was rushing to do his homework. He had to think of five ways we use numbers every day. Lily was coming up with a few and he was frustrated that he couldn't.

Laszlo: I can't believe Lily is smarter than me.
Lily: Don't say that! You teach me all the smart stuff.

Lily says a bunch of words incorrectly. And because I can't stand when my kids grow or change, I embrace all of the mistakes. She calls breakfast "brefeks". Until last week, she counted, "one, two, free, four," etc. So we were in the car before on the way to karate. Lily said, "I love my brother." I said, "What did you say??" She said, "I don't say brovver anymore because the kids in my class taught me how to say the "th" sound."

WTF????

I said, "Which kids taught you that? Was it all the kids or just a few?"

She said, "It was Samantha, and Ryan, and - oh, there were only nine kids in my class today! Can you believe it?"

I said, "Really? How come?"

She said, "All the other kids had fever. I mean feether. Oh my god, I can't believe I know how to say that the right way now too."

As long as she still says brefeks, I should be ok. ;-)

Lily: I wish I could be a super hero. My name would be Super Hero Lily.

Me: What would your super power be?

Lily: I could save persons. From danger.

(pause)

Lily: I would love to be a veterinarian and I would love to be a mommy like you.

Lily, Ella and I take a music class every Thursday. It's based on the very popular Music Together series, only the teacher left that organization and rerecorded all the music adding her own touches. A local family hosts the class at their house. The dad is usually home because he's a cantor and the mom doesn't work. Their older daughter T is in Lily's class and the younger one is under a year old.

A few months ago we started staying for lunch with one other mom (my friend Lori) and her two daughters, also one in Lily's class and the other under a year.

The other girls are not four yet and Lily's been four since March. Lori's daughter Eden is very friendly, pretty mature, gorgeous, etc. T is a baby. A spoiled baby. And she worships Eden. It's the typical two against one dynamic with the big girls every week.

I spoke to Lori about Eden and T leaving Lily out. She spoke to Eden and since then Eden has been significantly better. T has not. T's mom has spoken to her and I've seen her scold her on many occasions, but she just does not listen.

Today the girls were playing and T took a toy away from Lily to give it to Eden. She looked at me, saw that I was upset and then gave Lily a different toy.

The girls went into the basement to play while the parents and babies were upstairs after lunch. I thought I heard Lily crying, so I said, "I can't tell if it's laughter or crying I hear." The other moms agreed that if it was crying, one of them would have been upstairs to tattle, since that happens a dozen times while we're there.

No tattling.

About ten minutes went by and I felt that it was Lily crying, so I said, "You know, I may be paranoid, but that sounds like Lily crying to me."

I went downstairs.

Lily was in hysterics, outside the office in the basement, the door to the office was shut. T and Eden were inside the room, not letting Lily in. Lily was trying to open the door but couldn't, and she was screaming and crying asking them to let her in.

I opened the door and saw Eden on the computer playing and T with her fucking evil face looking up at me. She was actually taking pleasure in the fact that she made Lily cry. It was clear as day. She only wiped the smile off her face when I started to go ballistic telling them it wasn't ok that they did that to Lily. I wanted to shake the shit out of that kid, but I refrained and instead comforted my child and took her upstairs to clean up her tears.

I told the grown ups what happened. They went right downstairs and were there for a few minutes. T and Eden came up and apologized to Lily in that lame ass way kids apologize when they're forced to.

I couldn't even look at my friends. I just had to leave. I wanted to cry. I still want to cry. Lily is the sweetest fucking child I've ever met. She's never mean. She never leaves anyone out. When I took Lily upstairs she was telling me through her sobs that she told them earlier that if they were nice to her she'd invite them to her birthday. She was trying to guarantee that they weren't mean to her. She thought the promise of a party would cinch it. But it didn't work. Bitches.

In the car I told Lily flat out that I don't think T is a nice girl. I told her that I think Eden is nice, but that sometimes when there are three kids, it's hard to all get along. Then I told her that we're not staying for lunch anymore after music. It's ok if they ignore her during class because she's with me and she's participating. But this is ridiculous.

I don't have to stay anywhere my kids aren't 100% comfortable, let alone a place that makes her cry every freakin' week.

Also, I know Lori's going to say that the girls aren't always mean to her, that Lily has to toughen up, etc. If that was the case, Lily would cry in other social situations, which she does NOT. She has play dates all the time and this is the ONLY thing that makes her cry like that.

I'm so angry. I'm mostly angry at myself for putting Lily on the line like that. For not going downstairs the first time I thought I heard her crying. For giving a shit what my peers think even when my momma bear instincts are always right.

This is half way to her pissed off face

Lily called me to the fridge and said, "Mommy, does this spell 'magnets'?" I didn't even look at first, because I thought she was just playing around. Nope. She spelled "magnis" She was SO proud. So was I.

Of course, Laszlo came in and told her that she misspelled it and had to add the T, so she did that and then asked me to take another picture.

Lily was complaining her belly hurt, so I made her some tea and explained that it sometimes settles the stomach.

I put an ice cube and some honey in it.

She sipped it and said, "Mommy, it doesn't taste very good."

I told her she didn't have to drink it.

"It tastes like squirrel."

"Squirrel?!?!"

"Squirrel poop."