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He'll never change
Dec. 2nd, 2006 04:21 pmRobert has been the same throughout my pregnancies. He just doesn't *get* it, and I'm so easy. I don't expect much. I still prefer to be in charge and hold the house together.
That said, I've been in a lot of physical pain lately, and he knows this. On Sunday night I could barely move without being in agony. I've asked him to help bring some stuff downstairs from upstairs (from the switching around rooms) and it's been up there for weeks.
I told Robert yesterday that it was my worst day for sciatica/groin pain. He called from the train to see if there was anything he could bring home for me. I said, "Ice cream would be good." He said, "I meant something from the drug store." I keep telling him there's nothing I'm allowed to take other than Tylenol and I already have an ice pack. He did get the ice cream, with no complaints.
After we all had some ice cream, we were in the basement playing. Lily was having her typical trouble making a poop and she was doing "my doodie dance" to try and get it out. We smelled that she was at least partially successful, so I took out the changing pad, diaper, wipes, etc. to change her. She wasn't done, so she wouldn't come...but once I start cleaning her, she always gets the rest out. Robert was lying on the couch, I was sitting on the floor in front of the mat. He didn't BUDGE to get her for me. She wouldn't come. So after some coaxing, I ended up getting up and grabbing her, he didn't even *think* to get off his ass and help me.
About a half hour later we were all upstairs in bed. Lily was sleepy and Laszlo was overtired and rambunctious. I announced that I was "off duty physically" because of the pain. Robert was complaining about Laszlo's behavior and saying how he had no room on the bed, etc. Then he said, "Laszlo, I'm gonna take you into your room in a few minutes." I had no idea why he was waiting. So a few minutes later, he said it again. I said, "Just take him now." He said, "I said in a few minutes."
A few more minutes pass, Robert keeps on complaining. I said, "Can you take him into his room now?" Robert said, "He doesn't wanna go." I said, "Yeah, I know that. And I'm asking you to take him into his room." He told Laszlo to go with him, he wouldn't. So Robert then said, "Laszlo, I'm gonna take Lily in your room then." Laszlo was fine with that. So he took Lily into Laszlo's room and they *both fell asleep*. I was up with Laszlo, who was still rambunctious and wild. This went on for about another half hour before I realized how fucking ridiculous it was that Robert and Lily were out cold and I was, yet again, taking care of a wild overtired child. Laszlo went to the bathroom and the toilet was a little clogged from one of Lily's explosions so I was sitting there plunging the freaking toilet and then I just said to myself, "This is unacceptable."
I went into Laszlo's room and Robert said he was awake (I think the plunging and cursing woke him). I said, "This just isn't fair. You're both sleeping in here and I'm taking care of Laszlo." Robert said he was tired too, "dead tired" and that he needed to sleep also. It's always a fucking competition about whose needs "win" and guess who usually loses. I said, "I'm almost 8 months pregnant, I've been in severe pain all day, and you're sleeping here."
I put Lily in her crib and she stayed asleep.
Robert stayed with Laszlo in his bed for a few minutes and then Laszlo asked him to leave. Robert came into our room and the TV was on. It was about 10:30 at this point. He said, "Oh, you're watching TV in here??!!" Then he grabbed some sweats and said that he was going to sleep in the basement. I said, "You've got to be fucking kidding me. What if one of them wakes up?"
He claimed that I could have taken Lily into Laszlo's room and gone to sleep with her. But that wasn't really what I had in mind. I ASKED him to take Laszlo into his room and get him to sleep. He actually said, "What have you done tonight to get these kids to sleep?" I said, "I put them to sleep the other 364 nights a year, tonight I needed some help."
Fucker.
So he actually went and slept in the basement. And Lily woke up at 3:48 am and didn't go back to sleep until after 6.
I'm so fuming mad. I want to kick him in the balls. I want to slap him in the face. I want him to feel this groin pain for 5 minutes and try to walk up the stairs. I want him to have to wake up a dozen times to pee at night. I want a little fucking compassion and understanding. He's just totally incapable.
And today we're supposed to go, as a family, to visit my friend in the mental hospital. Yeah, sounds strange, but in our world it's actually a nice fit. She asked that I bring the kids so she can be cheered up and I know that Robert will make her laugh. I know it would have been a nice day if he wasn't such a motherfucker last night. At 4:00 Laszlo has a birthday party to go to. There's a chance that Lily will be asleep at this time, then I'll probably stay home with her, even though I actually enjoy going to the parties (Laszlo's so social now and it's a pleasure to watch him, plus free pizza and cake, what's better than that?@?!)
Robert told me last week that he was going to get me a piece of jewelry when Ella's born. He described it to me and it's something I'd *never* wear. He told me to pick something else out, so you can all bet your asses I'll be at the jewelry store this week to get something extravagant for myself. I was originally looking for something less expensive than he had mentioned because I'm really NOT a jewelry person, but shit, I can be persuaded if something's pretty enough.
My mom wasn't around this morning, so I needed somewhere to rant. Thanks LJ. :-)
That said, I've been in a lot of physical pain lately, and he knows this. On Sunday night I could barely move without being in agony. I've asked him to help bring some stuff downstairs from upstairs (from the switching around rooms) and it's been up there for weeks.
I told Robert yesterday that it was my worst day for sciatica/groin pain. He called from the train to see if there was anything he could bring home for me. I said, "Ice cream would be good." He said, "I meant something from the drug store." I keep telling him there's nothing I'm allowed to take other than Tylenol and I already have an ice pack. He did get the ice cream, with no complaints.
After we all had some ice cream, we were in the basement playing. Lily was having her typical trouble making a poop and she was doing "my doodie dance" to try and get it out. We smelled that she was at least partially successful, so I took out the changing pad, diaper, wipes, etc. to change her. She wasn't done, so she wouldn't come...but once I start cleaning her, she always gets the rest out. Robert was lying on the couch, I was sitting on the floor in front of the mat. He didn't BUDGE to get her for me. She wouldn't come. So after some coaxing, I ended up getting up and grabbing her, he didn't even *think* to get off his ass and help me.
About a half hour later we were all upstairs in bed. Lily was sleepy and Laszlo was overtired and rambunctious. I announced that I was "off duty physically" because of the pain. Robert was complaining about Laszlo's behavior and saying how he had no room on the bed, etc. Then he said, "Laszlo, I'm gonna take you into your room in a few minutes." I had no idea why he was waiting. So a few minutes later, he said it again. I said, "Just take him now." He said, "I said in a few minutes."
A few more minutes pass, Robert keeps on complaining. I said, "Can you take him into his room now?" Robert said, "He doesn't wanna go." I said, "Yeah, I know that. And I'm asking you to take him into his room." He told Laszlo to go with him, he wouldn't. So Robert then said, "Laszlo, I'm gonna take Lily in your room then." Laszlo was fine with that. So he took Lily into Laszlo's room and they *both fell asleep*. I was up with Laszlo, who was still rambunctious and wild. This went on for about another half hour before I realized how fucking ridiculous it was that Robert and Lily were out cold and I was, yet again, taking care of a wild overtired child. Laszlo went to the bathroom and the toilet was a little clogged from one of Lily's explosions so I was sitting there plunging the freaking toilet and then I just said to myself, "This is unacceptable."
I went into Laszlo's room and Robert said he was awake (I think the plunging and cursing woke him). I said, "This just isn't fair. You're both sleeping in here and I'm taking care of Laszlo." Robert said he was tired too, "dead tired" and that he needed to sleep also. It's always a fucking competition about whose needs "win" and guess who usually loses. I said, "I'm almost 8 months pregnant, I've been in severe pain all day, and you're sleeping here."
I put Lily in her crib and she stayed asleep.
Robert stayed with Laszlo in his bed for a few minutes and then Laszlo asked him to leave. Robert came into our room and the TV was on. It was about 10:30 at this point. He said, "Oh, you're watching TV in here??!!" Then he grabbed some sweats and said that he was going to sleep in the basement. I said, "You've got to be fucking kidding me. What if one of them wakes up?"
He claimed that I could have taken Lily into Laszlo's room and gone to sleep with her. But that wasn't really what I had in mind. I ASKED him to take Laszlo into his room and get him to sleep. He actually said, "What have you done tonight to get these kids to sleep?" I said, "I put them to sleep the other 364 nights a year, tonight I needed some help."
Fucker.
So he actually went and slept in the basement. And Lily woke up at 3:48 am and didn't go back to sleep until after 6.
I'm so fuming mad. I want to kick him in the balls. I want to slap him in the face. I want him to feel this groin pain for 5 minutes and try to walk up the stairs. I want him to have to wake up a dozen times to pee at night. I want a little fucking compassion and understanding. He's just totally incapable.
And today we're supposed to go, as a family, to visit my friend in the mental hospital. Yeah, sounds strange, but in our world it's actually a nice fit. She asked that I bring the kids so she can be cheered up and I know that Robert will make her laugh. I know it would have been a nice day if he wasn't such a motherfucker last night. At 4:00 Laszlo has a birthday party to go to. There's a chance that Lily will be asleep at this time, then I'll probably stay home with her, even though I actually enjoy going to the parties (Laszlo's so social now and it's a pleasure to watch him, plus free pizza and cake, what's better than that?@?!)
Robert told me last week that he was going to get me a piece of jewelry when Ella's born. He described it to me and it's something I'd *never* wear. He told me to pick something else out, so you can all bet your asses I'll be at the jewelry store this week to get something extravagant for myself. I was originally looking for something less expensive than he had mentioned because I'm really NOT a jewelry person, but shit, I can be persuaded if something's pretty enough.
My mom wasn't around this morning, so I needed somewhere to rant. Thanks LJ. :-)
